“I’ve never told anybody this. I’ve never said it out loud.” Through tears, her words were difficult to understand, but we all felt her heart.
I teach Mess of a Mom workshops in homes throughout my community. I begin with my story, my struggles, my qualifications to lead a workshop on being a mess. My list is long and varied, and it sets the stage for others to be vulnerable and open to the healing.
My story is the same, but the particular events I share are based on details that arise in the moment. And this day, I shared a piece of my story that resonated with one particular mother.
“I’ve never told anybody this. I’ve never said it out loud.” Through tears, her words were difficult to understand, but we all felt her heart. Until then, her struggle had been private.
Here’s the thing about struggle. It’s through the release of the words, the emotion, and the burden of holding it inside that we are lifted. It’s through the understanding that someone else sees you, and hears you, and feels the depths of your pain that you exhale.
Your story is personal and private, and those who are privileged to hear it are part of the healing process. For you, and for them.
Your story is not too much, it’s not too big, and I promise it’s not too scary to walk through when the arms that carry it have gone before.
The thing about being a mess is that we think we’re the only ones. We think that our story defines us, isolates us, and holds us back.
What if our story is the breath that brings another back to life? What if our story brings someone else out of the darkness we have navigated and is their first glimpse of light?
Storytelling is for the brave. It’s for the open who are willing to hold the space for another as a reminder that they are not alone.
Your story matters.
We’re in this together.
How Can I Help?
- Grab a journal, a cup of tea, and pen in pink or purple. (OK, any color will work, but why use anything other than pink or purple pens. Green is a close second, but I won’t judge.)
- Write about your story. What memories come to the top as you trace the mountain you have climbed?
- What are your pain points, your defining moments, your trials you’ve overcome? Write it all out. You deserve to look at what you’ve endured and learned.
- As you look at the mountain you’ve climbed, what are you proud of? What tools do you now carry because of the hard times in your life?
- Finally, how can you use this information to help someone else? What can you do for someone else on their journey? Maybe it’s compassion, a judgement free zone, or the encouragement that it won’t always feel like it does now.
- Your journey is not wasted. The struggle is real. It is also an opportunity to meet someone else exactly where they are.